How I live with Endo has changed over the years. When I was 12, the short answer was I didn’t. I was told by an ignorant doctor that I had “cramps” and that pain was to be expected. What doctor would consider a child vomiting from pain to be remotely normal?? When I was in my teens I suffered greatly. I missed some school from pain and when I didn’t stay at home, I would miss key points in classes because I was so zoned out on painkillers. I don’t really know how I got accepted to university but I must have been smarter than your average bear.
In my 20s I discovered birth control and this effectively masked my symptoms totally. I had nearly a decade of feeling like a normal woman. My periods were light and virtually pain-free. I was relieved from my painful burden. I did reasonably well at my university course – I even made the dean’s list one semester. God, I miss those days!!
In my 30s I began to try for babies; what little success I had ended in miscarriage. The pain was as bad as ever. I remember once my ex-husband, Ramman, said to me that my pain was ruining any holiday time that we ever had (including when we went to Portugal, the West Country and Greece). Of course he was insensitive: it’s not as if I was bleeding from the eyes. He couldn’t see why I was in pain. When I was finally diagnosed at the age of 35, my ex-husband still couldn’t understand why I was in so much agony. He made the point that he wasn’t particularly interested in gynaecological matters. His inability to attempt to sympathise is another reason why he’s now my ex-husband!
I wonder how many other relationships have been destroyed by Endo?
Currently I take birth control for 9 weeks and then allow myself a short period before my lengthened cycle starts again. It sounds easy enough but PMT can last weeks and I tend to carry a bit of excess water. However, when faced with the choice of my familiar pain or PMT, I’d rather a bit of PMT (which I treat effectively with Milk Thistle) and feel a bit podgy. Lucky for me, Helios is sensitive to my plight, he’s never considered me lazy because I need to lay in bed with a hot water bottle; he doesn’t give me any extra stress. In fact, he told me recently when I was bemoaning my weight/size that I shouldn’t lose any weight: he likes me just how I am.